57/365💩

Today was supposed to be about my parents. Dad runied it all and I have  given up on him. I don't want to say I hate him because it aches me. I am grateful for everything he has done but I hate this side of him where he doesn't respect anyone. He runied everything. That's his thing now. I am never gonna marry anyone. I am not gonna be a good girl to them anymore. I won't do anything just to please him or just because I feel obliged. I wish he was different. I don't want him to be dead. But situation right now seems sooo impossible. I don't even know what will make him a better person. I wish my mom's life to be better. I wish I could do better. I feel really sorry for everyone who put up so much efforts. 

That is why I don't post anything about my parents wedding anniversary because I wish they hadn't met. I feel sooo sad. I've no idea how am I gonna pull myself up.